This wasn’t exactly an ideal hallmark for an impressionable female teenager.
“Well – Rounded” really?
The picture above would sure speak to a well rounded head of hairsprayed hair that’s for certain. But like hairstyles, trends change.
Let’s remember that I was a prodigy of the 70’s, when hippie chic “skinny” girls graced the Copper Tone commercials in string bikini’s. My reference points were either stick thin Sports Illustrated models and or Brooke Shields in her CALVINS. It became a right of passage to watch and maybe assist my older female cousins zip on their skin-tight bell bottom jeans past their protruding hip bones. Skinny was the only way.
Needless to say, I didn’t understand this “Well-Rounded” label which seemed to loosely float from the mouth of educators, coaches, dance instructors and church mentors used to describe me. The consistent nature of this adjective caused a major aversion to the title. In hindsight it was a clear classic case of bad word association. In my budding brain I was affiliated somewhere between FAT girl and little Miss Piggy.
Later I gathered the nerve to ask daddy what it meant to be “well-rounded” and he told me that it meant that I was balanced. BALANCED? Balanced…just what every girl wants to hear. Instead of embracing this complimentary word, I suppressed it. I imagined dad was covering to protect my feelings.
“Well-rounded” became a hidden dark word that I grew to hate. Little by little my body image became seriously distorted. As an early bloomer I was, in my mind a misfit compared to my petite friends. I hit puberty first which made me feel out of sorts and heftier in comparison.
Not long after, I recall hearing a new word wafting around. Voluptuous! Why, for the love of living, didn’t I hang on to this one?
At the time…the word voluptuous to me was not a good thing. I was still sucked into the advertising vortex of unrealistic expectations of skinny girl. Voluptuous was a label for my grandmother who wore one piece bathing suits. Voluptuous was for the old ladies with their coned underwire bras and high-waisted panties. voluptuous was for old pin up girls. No super models of the 80’s were proudly voluptuous.
All I knew was that words I associated as negative were following me around like white on rice. I didn’t want to be well-rounded or voluptuous. I wasn’t proud of my blessings and changing body. I fell into the viscous cycle of starvation mode and feeding my face mode. We all know now that this yo yo dieting doesn’t do any body any favors.
Later, while in college, it was now the nineties and Oprah was skinny. Madonna was ripped from doing yoga and I just knew I wanted to ditch the well-rounded cloud once and for all. Suddenly there was hope for this well rounded baby-faced 20-year-old.
I started to exercise and eat a healthy diet. I ditched juices, soda, pizza and my body started to change. All the while, Jennifer Lopez and other full-figured women were blazing a trail for shapely toned bodies. Thankfully, the world started to appreciate muscles and girth.
In 2019 I hope we have grasped that a healthy toned FIT body is the ticket. It’s also more attractive than gaunt concave cheeks.
What’s more, is I educated myself by learning the true meaning of well-rounded, which is a compliment! WHO KNEW? Well rounded meant that I had a broad spectrum of knowledge and easily FIT in with a variety of friend groups. It meant that I was balanced in social circles and comfortable in my own skin…which clearly I was NOT! I was insecure because I had a poor understanding of the well-rounded endorsement.
Which leads me to my final point…
How often does this happen in life? How regularly do we go through a day or years or life with insecurities completely based on false misunderstandings? We hear something from a person of authority and true or not we start to believe a misinterpreted lie.
Have you been mis labled? Have you pegged yourself as the stay at home frumpy mom who will never lose the baby weight? Do you think you are powerless over food? Do you feel stuck behind a desk and feel helpless and hopeless?
It’s all a lie. There is freedom!
I’m so stinking proud to be a “well-rounded” woman! Not to mention that my whole career is based on gains. I actually train to keep my butt tight, round and lifted and my waisted synched in for a curvy appeal. VOLUPTUOUS and WELL ROUNDED
Give yourself permission to grant yourself a new title. You’re the boss. Pick a word any word and meditate on it. Marinate on it and you will start to believe it. The mind is a powerful powerful tool and can as easily be used in a positive manner. Stamp yourself with positive affirmations.
I assumed that people saw me as round. I believed it and it led to serious body dimorphia.
What I didn’t see is that my well roundedness is what made me unique. I’m an artsy out of the box thinker. I have a different lens than some people. I bring humor to everything because life is FUNNY! This is a much better mindset don’t you think?
At some point I dealt with my body image issues. When I chucked the scale 9 years ago my life changed forever. I eat healthy, I exercise and I never weigh. I judge my body by how my clothes fit. It’s that simple and easy.
I get up every morning and do the work and walk the walk. I seek truth and chuck the lies. I embrace muscles and health.
What do you need to start believeing? I can help you start believing in yourself. You can change the way you view food and your body. Increase energy and get active. This is the truth.
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